December 17th, 2006 posted by Bender Rodríguez
a conversation with my ex in dreamscape leaves me wondering why she's smarter than i even in my own dreams
we were poolside at the family home in wisconsin, i can't remember much else except that we were playing around and cuddling in the water, all very comforting. then she was all like, "i don't know what you expect from all of this. i mean, do you really think that we can just pick up where we left off five years ago."
i really did not know what to say. she was correct, of course. why could i not have seen the truth of this on my own, in the real world? why did i have to hear it from her in order to understand the reality of my situation? strange that. very curious indeed. i am grateful, and i would like to cultivate this type of knowledge exchange. i just need to conjure it up somehow. i suppose she appeared to me in my dreams because i had just come across her photo site, diannasaurus, and i was not preparred for the emotional impact of seeing her after all these years. so it was like she was saying, get over it, move on, can't you see i'm busy here?
i guess i just needed to hear from her directly, even if in a dream.
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